Amongst all of my not-blogging last week, I whittled away the stick of time by questioning the underlying messages behind German advertisements. This was not-so-difficult because said messages are not-so-subtle. In short, one could summarize marketing as so: creepiness sells.
I've attempted to gather photographic evidence for you, my two fans, but didn't have much success. Exhibit A (below) is tiny and fuzzy so I will have to recreate it linguistically.
In this is a Deutsche Bahn advertisement, an Alec Baldwin doppelganger rides a train happily in the adoring company of a much younger Anne Hathawayesque lady. Conclusion of Deutsche Bahn's marketing goal? Make all potential customers cringe at the creepiness of the poster and therefore come running eagerly to buy train tickets and, by direct association, secure the affections of an older businessman.
(This next add was pointed out to me by a friend, just to give credit where it's due.) At first shifty it looks like a normal, gray, colorless high fashion advertisement. At second shifty (this is your cue to take a second shifty everyone) you notice a creepy old man wearing young man clothes and lurking in the background next to a car. You see him? And then you begin to notice that anywhere you travel in Mainz, this old man is lurking in the background of every advertisement, always wearing the same sunglasses! I couldn't find the ultimate display of his creeptasticity, which is a poster of him sneaking up behind a young brunette who's strolling down a dimly lit street. But regardless of the fact that the old man is the designer, he has no right whatsoever to creep on the wearers of his clothing. Once he sells it, it's no longer his.
So wherein lies the marketing goal? Herein: Make young women fear that if they purchase famous designer clothing, the famous designer comes with the purchase.
Not exactly in linear relation, but still in the theme of marketing are the following photographs of my favorite sights of Mainz.
It says "Pain Center". Of course, upon reading it for the first time, common sense kicked in an I walked in the opposite direction at top speed.
This one is my favorite; a package of cookies in the grocery store.
It reads "Hearts without stuffing". Empty hearts in Germany. How tragic.
I shall now conclude with one final wish for you:
please let me counted as part of the TFB! i do not nag because i would be quite the hypocrite. sophie, your writing makes laughter spontaneously burst from my mouth. it is wonderful. however, i must inform you that the phrase "whittled away the stick of time" produced an image in my mind's eye of you taking a large knife to a stick bug, methodically 'shaving' away his bark.
ReplyDeleteyeah, chi, I don't like being excluded, and in fact would subject myself to some kind of test to prove my worthiness. Also, that woman from the DBahn looks like Faith Hill.
ReplyDeleteI would just like to say that you make me want to write. Or just read everything you write. all. the. time. because it makes me laugh uncontrollably.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I've TOTALLY seen that DBahn commercial with the old dude and young chic! phaha! I was left dumbfounded when I first saw it. And I only become more and more confused every time I see it. which is unfortunately often.. due to my deutsche serie, Alles was zählt, die ich immer noch täglich gucke.. lol! it's a good time : )
Also, I vermiss dich.